Sorrows of the Past
by Veila596
Summary: So, this is my first fanfic! Its set before the series and is basically my version of what happened when Amelie found that Myrnin, because of the virus, killed Ada and how guilty he felt after. Bad summery. Lol Please take a look...you know you want to.:D
1. Opening

_**A/N: Hey, I would just like to mention that this is my first fan fiction! You may do with that information what you wish…. Lol. Hope you like it! I'd also just like to thank my Beta reader! :D Couldn't have done it without her! R&R please! **_

_**Also, to avoid any confusion, the story is set before the Morganville's series takes place and is about the day when Amelie finds that Myrnin has killed Ada. **_

_**Amelie's pov**_

As I sat in my office, I wondered what to do about Myrnin and Ada. To say I was worried about them was an understatement. They have both been weakened by this...sickness that they, and other vampires alike, have developed. At the moment, Myrnin is by far the worst. Ada has been taking care of him and helping him as best she can, but who knows how long it will last. She too, is becoming weak and showing major signs that the sickness that she bares is getting worse, though still not quite as bad as Myrnin's.

The last time I visited them in the lab was a few months ago. For reasons unknown to me, they insist on residing in it, as if I wasn't prepared to offer them one of the founder houses. In particular, I was going to offer them the Day house, which was originally built near the lab so they could be close by. Ada had called to inform me that the whole sickness had taken a turn for the worst. Solemn news this was, but true none the less.

Almost every vampire in town, myself included, is showing signs of the sickness. As of now, my only hope is that Myrnin and Ada will succeed in finding a cure. I have been monitoring their progress regularly, but I feel that a visit may very well be appropriate, considering that I am showing slight signs of the sickness. I looked down at my hand that was gently resting on my lap, when it jerked slightly, against my will. This would have gone unnoticed by a human, and even by a younger vampire, but to me it was a large reminder that the sickness was spreading and a cure must be found before it is too late. With that in mind, I stood up and put on my coat, deciding that it would be best to go to see Myrnin and Ada now rather than later.

I decided to walk to the lab, under the cover of darkness and unaccompanied by my entourage. This was a matter that I wished to keep secret from as many vampires as possible and for as long as possible. I think that for now it is best to abide by the saying 'what they don't know can't hurt them.' Besides, I fear that if other vampires become educated as to what the sickness is and what it does, they may begin to use it as an excuse to hunt humans. This would cause a complete uproar and the peace that I have worked to build between vampires and humans would fall and cease to exist.

After a short while, I reached the lab. Before going into the alley where the lab is situated, I stopped to ensure I was not being followed. Satisfied that I was indeed alone, I walked up to the lab and knocked at the door, but there was no immediate answer. I waited for a moment before deciding to chance going inside. The door was unlocked and opened easily, creating just enough noise to make my presence known. I have learned not to go barging in, as the last time I walked in, I saw something that I could truly have gone my entire existence without witnessing.

I walked inside and cautiously stepped down the stairs. "Myrnin?", I gently called out. "Ada? Are you here?". Well, I certainly hope they're here. God knows what chaos would accumulate were they not, but it is safe to say it would end rather badly for a number of humans. My inner monologue was cut short by what I saw before me.

There was Myrnin, shaking and cowering in the corner of the room with both hands pressed up against his face. Panic hit me instantly. It would take quite a lot to reduce Myrnin to something like this and I immediately knew something very bad had happened. A familiar scent reached me and horrified, I surveyed the room. It was entirely covered in blood, vampire blood. And to be more specific…..Ada's blood.

**_Hope you liked it! Please tell me what you thought of it! :D_**


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Don't own anything. Its all of the mind of the brilliant Rachel Caine! Enjoy! :D

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**Amelie's pov**

_A familiar scent reached me and horrified, I surveyed the room. It was entirely covered in blood, vampire blood. And to be more specific…Ada's blood._

I took an unnecessary breath and cautiously approached Myrnin. He hadn't moved since I came in. I made sure to stand out of arms reach from him, to insure that he was in his right state of mind, and whispered his name softly. He stopped dead but didn't look up. "W-What...whatever happened here?" I stammered, already having somewhat of an idea but praying that it wasn't true. "Myrnin," I said his name, louder now, needing for him to look at me.

This time he seemed to hear me, and he slowly removed his hands from his face to glance in my direction. His eyes were slightly widened, as if he hadn't expected to see me standing there, and there were crimson stains on his shirt. He opened his mouth to explain, only he couldn't. He made a choking sound and dropped his gaze completely.

When he did finally look up, I could see he was distraught. There were tears of complete and utter agony rolling down his face and his eyes were empty. They were full of nothing but pain and regret, unlike the usual brightness, life, and well…..occasional madness that is usually evident in them. It looked like something had died inside him. Were my heart still beating, the sight of seeing him like that would have stopped it dead.

I closed my eyes for an instant to regain my composure and refrain from shedding a few tears myself because of Myrnin and then bent down in front of him. I touched my hand to his face softly in effort to comfort him, but he turned his face away. "No" he said quietly, pain evident in his voice. "I do not deserve comfort, don't presume to give it to me. You…..you do not yet know what I have done," he finished, his voice shaking towards the end of his sentence and again, he averted his gaze back to the ground. I sighed gently, already having somewhat of an idea of what had happened. I gave him one last look of pity before I stood up solemnly and searched the lab and the other rooms inside it to survey the rest of the damage and to find out once and for all exactly what had happened.

Like the lab, the other rooms were in a state of chaos. There were books and broken bits of furniture scattered on the floor, bookcases that had been toppled to the ground and there were broken pieces of glass everywhere. The entire place looked like a bomb had went off inside it. That wasn't the worst of it though. When I walked into the sitting room the first thing that hit me was the intense scent of blood, and sure enough, there was Ada lying motionless in the centre of the room, covered in deep crimson. I inhaled sharply and lingered by the doorway for an instant to steady myself. Even after all my years of witnessing tragic events, I was still somewhat surprised by what I saw. I had never gone as far as calling Ada my friend, but Myrnin cared for her deeply. There are simply no words to describe what he must be feeling. He had just lost his companion, his co-worker, his love, and at no other hands but his own. Losing the love of your life must be difficult enough, but also knowing that it was in some way your fault must be almost unbearable.

I gracefully stepped closer to her and examined her. She was dead. Really dead, just to clarify. She had been drained of all her blood. Her eyes were still opened with an expression of fear and surprise. I gently closed them and bent over her to plant a kiss lightly on her forehead, a symbol to show my respect for her. I closed my eyes, taking a small moment to remember her, when I sensed and then heard Myrnin enter the room.

I turned around to see him standing in the furthest corner of the room, as far away from Ada as possible. He stared sorrowfully at what he had done and there was guilt and regret written upon his face. "She was so weak…..so weak ,Amelie! I-I couldn't stop myself. I tried, so very hard. I…loved her..." He was cut off by another sob and he broke down crying again. I rushed over across the room to him to try to comfort him and this time he let me. Seeing my friend like this brought tears to my eyes, but I pushed them back. I wanted to remain strong for Myrnin. There would be no point in the two of us being unable to communicate.

We stayed as we were for a moment, then he pulled away and went to sit down beside where Ada lay. He gently stroked her cheek with his hand and bent down to kiss her one last time before muttering over and over, "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it, so very sorry." In this moment, I could see his heart was truly broken. I felt the need to look away and give him some privacy, but after a few minutes of letting him be, I went over to him and guided him out of the room. I would hate for this moment to be the only real memory he could muster when he looked back on their time together.

I sat him down at the table and positioned my own chair so that I could sit beside him. I feel so awful for him and just wish there was something I could do to take away his pain, but I didn't know what. Instead, I just held his hand tightly to show I was there for him. In the back of my mind, however, I couldn't help but think if he would do the same to me were I to become so weak, even after all our years of friendship. This thought didn't force me to pull away. To the contrary, it only made me hold him tighter, all the while hoping that things would get better, that he would get better. As long as I can see that he is still trying to fight the sickness and trying to stop it from controlling him, I would never in good heart give up on him.

We sat there, unspeaking in the silence for hours. I could see by his expression that he was in deep thought, most likely thinking about his actions and how he couldn't stop himself from killing her. I stared at him sadly before saying, "It wasn't your fault, please try to remember that. I know were you in your right mind, you would have been able to stop yourself. It was all the disease, it…." He cut me off. "No Amelie. The disease only enhanced my true nature, even if I was not sick I would probably have done what I did, or at least, part of me would have wanted to do," he snapped darkly. "No, no you wouldn't have. As you said, only part of you. Besides, you tried to stop yourself," I said, trying to get through to him. I have known him for years and he would never have done this to Ada if he were not sick. If only he would see that. He then laughed bitterly. "Clearly not hard enough," he said angrily. He then proceeded to stand up and then slam his hands against the table so hard that it broke under the pressure. I rolled my eyes and sighed. There was no getting through to him now. Well, I now know why the rooms have been destroyed.

I looked down at my watch. "Myrnin, please. Why don't we just talk about it. I understand that you find it helpful to damage every belonging that is in your reach, but you've been doing it continuously for half an hour now. I'm truly amazed you are still finding things to break," I said, raising my voice towards the end as he threw yet another test tube against the wall, causing it to shatter. He glared in my direction, eyes red, and started coming towards me. I quickly stood up and went into a defensive crouch, thinking he was now actually rounding on me but he stopped midway, realizing what he was doing. "Sorry," he muttered. "You are forgiven. This must be so hard for you to deal with," I said, pitying him. He nodded and suddenly ran out of the room, shouting something behind him that I didn't quite catch.

I stood there, slightly confused at his sudden change, before following him. I found him into the room where Ada was. He was standing over her with a knife...A knife? I ran over to him and pushed him away. "Myrnin, STOP!" I exclaimed. "What in the world were you doing?" Perhaps I have been deluding myself. Perhaps every ounce of sanity that was left in him is gone.

He looked at me calmly and replied with, "I think I know of a way to save her, but I must hurry. I've lost enough time as it is." I raised an eyebrow and stared blankly at him. "There is nothing you can do. She is gone, Myrnin. You can't save her. I'm sorry, but you just can't."

"You're wrong. Amelie, please. I have an idea of what to do, but I can't afford anymore distractions. Please, just leave me. You can trust me. Come back tomorrow evening and you'll see. I promise," he said quickly ,yet sincerely, begging for me to do as he asked.

I stood there for awhile, contemplating it, before eventually agreeing. After all, what more can he really do.

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Hope you liked it! Pleas R&R! xoxoxoxox


	3. Chapter 3

Ok so this is chapter 3 and is basically Myrnins POV of what has happened so far and also what happened a little before. Enjoy and please R&R. and sorry for not updating sooner, shame on me. ;) Lol.

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MYRNINS POV

"Myrnin, is everything alright? You look….do you need some medicine?" Ada questioned me from the other side of the room. She had been examining the difference between various blood samples of vampires with the sickness, those who are only showing small signs and the small number who are not yet showing any signs of it. I looked up from the notes I had been reading through, confused. Of course I was ok. How dare she even think I wasn't. I would be the first to identify if the sickness was about to take over!

"Yes, I'm perfectly fine. You worry too much, dear." She didn't seem convinced. Damn. I am clearly fine.

She put down the blood samples and walked over to stand in front of me, hands on hips. "You don't look perfect to me. There's a shadow under your eyes and you're acting as though I am provoking you. Please just take your medicine." Towards the end of her sentence her voice got quiet and weak. I frowned, wondering what was wrong. "Your fine, how am I? No, wait that didn't come out right. Did it?" I cursed under my breath. "What I meant to say was I am fine, but are you?"

"Myrnin, your sentences are getting jumbled and you're confused, take something. And don't lie and say they aren't because you noticed it too. Oh and I am tired, that's all, its nothing."

She sent me a small, forced smile before making her way back to the blood samples. I couldn't help but notice how carefully she was moving, as if she was trying to stop herself from falling to the ground. I also noticed just how divine her blood smelt. She was so weak and tired now that she would be unable to do anything if I just….NO! I shouted inwardly at myself. Why would I even think of doing that. I love Ada. But she smells so delicious and…

"MYRNIN?" The sound of her alarmed voice brought me out of my thoughts and I saw that while I was arguing with myself, I had somehow moved over to stand right beside her, close enough to bite her neck then and there. I quickly jumped back. "Sorry, I don't know how that happened. I think….maybe I should take that medicine now, or at least drink something. I'm so sorry." I knew I was rambling, but I was horrified by what had almost happened there.

"Alright, its ok. Yes take some medicine or blood or…." she stopped mid sentence as she grabbed onto the table, just stopping herself from falling. "Ada!" I rushed over to her and held her up. She was getting too weak to even stand on her own now. "You're ok, you're ok," I repeated, needing for it to be true. I carried her to the sitting room and lay her down on the sofa. "I'll be back in a minute, I love you," I whispered to her. "As I you," she managed to whisper back. Trying to conceal my worry, I gave her a smile, which she returned tiredly, and then rushed back to the lab.

Upon reaching the lab, I became confused. I didn't know why I had come in here and had forgotten what I was looking for. I frowned because of my confusion and tried to remember, but I couldn't. I walked around aimlessly for what must have been a few minutes, but still couldn't remember. Then I smelt a new presence and a woman stood in the doorway to the sitting room. "Myrnin, is everything ok?" she whispered.

I stared blankly. Who was she. I searched my mind, but just couldn't think. She was familiar, surely I knew her. "Who are you?" I questioned, my eyes narrowing in suspicion.

"What? Myrnin, what's going on. Stop it, take your medicine."

What is she on about. "I'll give you one last chance, who are you?"

Her eyes widened. "Ada, Myrnin its me, Ada. Please try to remember," she whispered frantically.

She was weak, I could sense it. I drew closer to her, and noticed the scent of her blood, so sweet. My eyes turned red and when she noticed she tried to run, but I of course was faster. I pushed her against the wall, entrapping her with my hands, and bit down on her neck.

Suddenly, recognition hit me and I stopped. Oh no. Oh god no. "Ada? Ada? Oh god, please answer me. Ada!" She had gone limp in my arms and I lay her down on the floor. "What have I done?" I whispered to myself, horrified. She can't be dead, I love her. She can't be gone, how will I go on. I can't live without her.

I stood up, hating myself because of what I had done. I had to save her. Surely I have something. There's always something. I ran to the bookcase and searched through it, throwing the useless books to the floor. When I found nothing I slammed my hand into the bookcase, breaking it. I tore through every room, trying to find something, anything. I couldn't live with this guilt. Finding that my attempts were fruitless, I smashed the glass beakers and test tubes to the ground. The sound of them shattering to the ground helped calm me a little. I watched them all break until they were nothing more than shattered pieces, unfixable. I suppose that's what I am right now. Shattered. If I can't help Ada, or at least talk to her once more, just once more, I will remain that way for a very long time. Unless of course the sickness takes control of me again. In thinking this I threw one last punch at the wall, breaking a hole in it.

I couldn't bare to go back in there, to where Ada lay. I sank to the floor in hopelessness and despair, wishing that I could find something to fix this mess. I just can't believe what had happened, what I had let myself become. I couldn't hold back the tears anymore and I cried. I can't lose Ada, I love her.

Suddenly I heard a female voice call my name. I looked up, hoping to see Ada, and that she was actually ok, but it was Amelie. I was about to try to explain, but I really couldn't. How could I explain that I had just drained my darling Ada of all blood? Who knows, maybe it will be her next. More tears quickly spilled down my face as I thought about the monster I was and how the disease could take control of me so easily. She tried to comfort me but I stopped her. I didn't deserve any, not after what I had done.

She then walked left me, presumably to find out what happened. The smell of Ada's blood was everywhere. She probably already knew what had happened.

After a little while, I stood up and made my way into the sitting room. In seeing Ada, a wave of overwhelming guilt washed over me and I couldn't bare the pain I felt. I stared at Ada for some time and then remembering that Amelie was in the room, I addressed her sadly. "She was so weak….so weak, Amelie! I-I couldn't stop myself. I tried, so very hard. I…I loved her…." I couldn't continue and when Amelie tried to comfort me again I let her. After a few minutes I pulled away and went to sit beside Ada. I softly caressed her cheek with my hand and then bent down to kiss her. I felt so guilty. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it, so very sorry."

Amelie then came over to me and led me out of the room to sit at the table. We talked a little and then I broke a more of my equipment which felt very satisfying, but Amelie wasn't too happy about it. Then, suddenly an idea struck me. I had been working on a machine to help Morganville. This was, of course, before the sickness had developed. But maybe if I used Ada's brain it would work. That would be both advantageous to me and it would also help Amelie. Delighted that I finally had somewhat of an idea that would enable me to see Ada again, I grabbed a knife and ran to Ada.

That must have confused Amelie a lot, but I had to get started right away. I needed it to work. Its selfish of me to do this, especially to Ada, but I need her, at least for a long enough time for her to know that I didn't want for this to happen and if I could have stopped it I would have.

I was about to start the whole procedure of removing her brain when Amelie came in and stopped me. "What in the world were you doing?" she questioned clearly thinking I had lost it completely.

"I think I know a way to save her, but I must hurry. I've lost enough time as it is."

"There is nothing you can do. She's gone Myrnin. You cant save her, I'm sorry, but you just can't."

"You're wrong. Amelie, please. I have an idea of what to do, but I cant afford any more distractions. Please, just leave me. You can trust me. Come back tomorrow evening and you'll see. I promise." I had to stop myself from pushing her out the door she took so long to agree but she finally did, and anyway, if I did that she definitely wouldn't have gone.

And with that, I got to work on the machine.

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Hope you had a good Christmas and happy New year! xoxoxoxoxoxox


	4. Chapter 4

Amelie's pov

The following evening, I walked to the lab once again. I felt utterly drained, as it had been a particulary long day of signing important papers and whatnot, and so I would very much have liked to just relax, though I knew that would be impossible. Myrnin seemed quite convinced that he could fix the damage he had done, and quite frankly, it worried me. His spirits would only drop even more were he to not succeed in whatever ingenius plan he had in mind, and I just won't be able to bare seeing him like that, especially on top of everything that is going awfully wrong at the moment. Now, not only do I have to deal with the disease, but have to control the humans who are becoming quite an issue. On two occaisions this week I have been called to investigate disturbances involving humans rebelling against vampires and I will not stand for it. The town is balancing on a very small rope at the moment as is. We, myself and Myrnin, will have to devise a plan to help with these various problems, and soon. All it really takes is one drastic disturbance and everything could just go up in smoke. I had seen it happen so many times before, but I can't afford for it to happen this time. This is our, every vampire who is left in the world, only real chance at survival and I don't intend to fail. I do hope Myrnin and I will be able to figure out something to do. Not to mind the fact that we can't possibly control what people tell others if they ever leave. I shook my head, trying to clear it. I can get back to these worries later on, but for now I shall see just what Myrnin has in store.

I slowed my pace as I reached the lab and stood at the door for an instant. I could hear the sound of Myrnin pacing quickly and talking; to himself, no doubt. I gently opened the door and then proceeded to gracefully glide down the stairs. Upon entering the lab, Myrnin popped up from underneath the floor board.

"Why hello Amelie, I've been expecting you. Do follow," he said enthusiastically, not giving me a chance to get one word in before he went back down from where he came from. Frowning, I gracefully leaped down into the floor and followed his scent until I reached him. I was shocked by what I saw before me. It was a giant, wooden...thing. I could not begin to explain my confusion.

"Myrnin? What in the world is this contraption?" I asked, not sure of what exactly to call it.

"It's Ada," he replied simply.

'Oh dear,' I thought. 'This isn't good. This isn't good in the slightest.'

"What do you mean it's Ada?" I asked, backing away slightly, fearing that he was truly gone.

"Well it's quite simple, actually, to explain but why not just show you? It will be easier and, dare I say, a lot more fun," he happily stated with a glint in his eye that I couldn't quite read. Somewhere between excitement and utter madness. That's what it lookedlike, in fact, thats how this entire situation sounded.

I stared at him for the longest amount of time before giving in.

"Ok Myrnin, what do you want me to see?"

Instead of answering me, he just walked over to his invention and pressed a button. Suddenly, the whole thing came to life.

Astounded, I staggered back before hearing what sounded like an electronic voice behind me. I turned to see none other than Ada standing there. Well, not Ada exactly. She was a two dimentional figure who did not appear real, rather she looked like some sort of hologram that you see in many of those sci-fi movies that humans are so interested in.

I gazed wide eyed at the invention, Ada, and back, before finally fixing my eyes on Ada.

"Ada?" I asked quietly, unsure of this whole situation. It just seemed so surreal, and I say this as a thousand year old vampire who has lived through and seen so much.

"Yes, I'm here. Myrnin saved me, well in what way he could at least."

"But...how...what? I'm sorry, Myrnin? Please explain what is going on?"

Myrnin came over to stand by my side before answering.

"As I said before, its quite simple to explain. This machine that you see before you acts as a type of security for the town and is operated by Ada's brain. It is basically the solution to all our problems. Ada will be able to open portals, bringing those who use it to a different location in Morganville in a matter of seconds, successfully. I am also delighted to inform you, dear Amelie, that the possibility of people outside of Morganville finding out about vampires has been resolved."

This in particular caught my attention so I pressed on. "What do you mean?"

"Well, Ada will have the ability to block peoples' memories of vampires and everything of the sort and actually replace it with the illusion of a different life spent here in the town. We will also be able to track exactly who enters and exits the town. Marvellous, isn't it?"

"Quite," I replied, "Though I can't help but ask, how are you certain this will actually work?"

"I've already tried it out, of course. Really Amelie, sometimes I do believe you have no faith in me at all."

"Its already been tested?"

"Well, it has been for sometime actually. Ada and I had everything in order, we just had no idea what to do, but yesterday I had an epiphany and it all came to me. Its a win win situation really. I can still communicate with Ada, and the major problems involving the town have been stabilized. Are you still unsatisfied?"

"No, it really is one weight off my shoulders, but I will be keeping a close eye on everything and you must be prepared to stop it at my command if a time comes where it is neccessary."

"Yes, yes, of course. Now, one other thing. The machine runs on blood."

"Very well. Pray you my friend that this works out."

"It will Amelie, the machine is perfect," he argued happliy.

"It is actually, he did a good job," Ada added in, talking through the radio in the corner of the room.

With that, I decided to take my leave. I do not know how I feel about Ada, beeing trapped here in a sense, well, in memory I guess. I do know, however, that the machine will be extremely beneficial to the town if it is indeed successful, and am more than delighted at the though that it is one less thing to have to worry about. However, I still could not believe it was actually Ada though, and that Myrnin had succeeded. I will not lie by saying I had the utmost faith in him for this exact experiment. He really has proved me wrong and also enlightened me to the fact that he is, in short, an absolute genius, even with the sickness. Because of this fact, I can't help but feel just a little more hopeful that a cure will be found.

Myrnin's pov

For this moment in time, while the disease was not taking hold of me, I felt almost happy. I had apologized to Ada a large number of times and she seems to have forgiven me, though I worry she just wanted to stop me from getting worked up. She did seem genuine, however, and I truly am. I've also, in the process, resolved the issues of the town, which is an added bonus. 'It will also keep Amelie happy for quite some time,' I thought to myself, pleased with my work, though still feeling awfully guilty at the cost of it all, Ada's life.


End file.
